Dating the Paranormally Challenged

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After a two-year hiatus from dating, I decided it was time to get myself back into the game. The biggest problem I soon faced wasn’t the additional years (and pounds) I put on since my last venture into the dating world. It was my paranormal affliction.

Being a sensitive isn’t something I chose. It’s something I was born with, an extra sense that allows me to communicate with the dearly departed. As it turns out, most men don’t consider this an attractive feature.

“If there’s something in my house, I don’t want to know,” a guy told me after several dates.

It didn’t take long to realize we were going to have a problem. Not only was his house haunted, it was occupied by more than one ghost. I picked up on two ghosts, one of whom was probably a deceased family member. I got a very clear image in my head. Later, when I saw a photo, I knew I was on track.

So what do you do with something like that?

I pondered over it for the entire drive home. I ended up keeping the information to myself. There was no reason to scare him by telling him he has two ghosts in his house and then leaving him there to contemplate it. They weren’t causing a ruckus and hadn’t shown themselves to the living. They just wanted to hang out. I am fine with that, but it brought to mind a plethora of issues. What kind of relationship would I be getting into? Would I have to keep all of my ghostly encounters to myself? Would I have to keep pushing Ghost Dad aside every time I visited?

Please indulge me and consider my normal world for a moment. Ghosts are virtually everywhere. You don’t need to go to a publicly acknowledged “haunted house” to find them. Nearly every house or building has someone lingering around. Do you remember the movie Thirteen Ghosts? In the movie, one of the characters had special glasses he could wear that allowed him to see ghosts. When he put them on, he quickly discovered there were ghosts all around him. Now, imagine that being your reality.

I don’t typically see ghosts, but I don’t need to. I hear them and feel them (and no, I’m not crazy…really). I hear a tone similar to ear ringing, which is often accompanied by a sensation I can’t really explain, even with all the words of Merriam-Webster at my disposal. It’s a knowing. It often comes with a mental snapshot of the way the ghost once looked in life.

Other sensitives understand what I’m talking about. Ghosts inhabit our world. They stay earth-bound for a variety of reasons, and many of them have no desire to move along to the great hereafter. Some of them are afraid to pass over into the light, the place they go after death. They might have done something bad on this realm and are afraid of the ramifications they’ll face when they get to the mystical Pearly Gates. Imagine someone who has committed suicide. Most religions tell us that suicides go to Hell. Would you want to take the chance? You see a white light appear at the end of a tunnel, and you instinctively know you’re supposed to go down there, but you hesitate. What if it’s a trap?

Hotels are a nightmare for me for reasons most people don’t consider. They are full of suicide victims. I’m sure that many suicides happen in the spur of the moment, but some of them are planned out in advance. Someone with a sense of compassion for his family might not want them finding his body, so what does he do? He checks into a hotel room, where the housekeeper will find him after he does the deed. If he imagined a sweet release for all the anguish and pain, he is sadly mistaken. Nothing changes after he dies except for the fact that he’s now without a body. He might see the white light and experience a sense of panic as he remembers the teachings of his church. He might pause long enough to miss his chance to cross over into the light, and before he knows it, he’s stuck in a Super 8 for all of eternity.

And then, here I come, with my key card and my travel bag, glowing like a bug light in the ethereal world. Sensitives must stand out to ghosts in some particular way. Ghosts take one look at us and swarm in like moths to a dusk-to-dawn light. He might think, “Hey, maybe she can help me. Maybe she can tell my wife that I love her, and that I didn’t mean to do this,” or maybe he’s hoping for directions to Heaven. The problem is: I can’t actually hear them talking. I know they’re there and can sometimes get an idea of what they look like, but their words are as lost to me as smoke in the wind. He’ll keep trying all night, often physically poking me, banging on the walls, or pulling on my covers to get my attention. If that doesn’t work, sometimes ghosts like him will follow me home, hoping I’ll have some sense of clarity later. Before I know it, I’m living in my own ghost hotel.

Other common places where I run into ghosts are restaurants and movie theaters. My theory is fairly simple. Ghosts need energy to manipulate their environment. They pull this energy from living people, sapping us like we are nothing more than giant AA batteries. They loiter in the places where there is an ample supply of candidates, and then they feast on us. Action movies and horror flicks are pretty popular among the dead, as are bars and restaurants, where emotions run high.

Once, when I was on a date with another guy, a ghost sauntered up to our table. I saw the ghostly man very clearly in my mind. He was a rotund fellow, with slicked-back hair and a bushy moustache. It was love at first sight for him. He imagined following me home and hanging around, watching me shower, cuddling up beside me in my bed, pulling energy from me, and tormenting me until I found a stronger medium to help me dislodge him. Normally, the minute I felt someone like him approach, I would have built an energy shield to push him away, something I usually do with my hands. While most mediums do this without physically moving, I’m not nearly as talented. I have to hold my hands over my head, imagining a bubble forming. I follow it down to my sides and then close my eyes, envisioning it filling with protective white light. Now, imagine doing this on a first date in a restaurant with a guy who doesn’t believe in ghosts.

Okay, go ahead and laugh. It is funny. I didn’t do it, though. I just sat there and tried to ignore the plump dead guy, while trying to keep up my end of the conversation. In the end, the ghost did follow me home. He made my life a living hell for several weeks until I was able to find a medium friend to help me move him along to somewhere else.

I haven’t found an easy solution for my situation. I’m still seeing the guy with the haunted house, but I’m not sure how long I can avoid the “is my house haunted” conversation. In the end, I know I need to be true to myself. I can’t just hide that part of me forever. He’ll either accept it or he won’t. If he doesn’t, then it’s time to move along. I’m just thankful he doesn’t read my blogs…or at least I don’t think he reads my blogs.

I guess I’ll find out soon enough. 🙂

 

Joni Mayhan is a paranormal investigator, as well as a free-lance writer. Please check out her paranormal thrillers on Amazon.com and BarnesandNobles.com. For more information about the author, please see her website: Jonimayhan.com

The Soul Collector – The true story of one paranormal investigator’s worst nightmare

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Angels of Ember trilogy – After a devastating virus nearly wipes the world clean of people, 16 year-old Ember Pain grows tired of running and hiding from the bad men who hunt her and her younger sister, Elizabeth. Fighting back becomes a necessity, even if it threatens her very life.

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 Lightning Strikes

Ember Rain

Angel Storm

 

 

2 thoughts on “Dating the Paranormally Challenged

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